Home People Avoid Dating Dead-Ends: Comparison Shoppers

Avoid Dating Dead-Ends: Comparison Shoppers

Feel like you keep pushing the wrong button? Sometimes were in such a hurry to rebuild our life that we settle for a space-filler choicethe best of whos readily available, rather than one with whom we can feasibly build a longterm relationship. Comparison Shoppers are either dating too soon or with casual intent. They can be male or femaleyep, woman do this too!and are one of 11 dating personalities that will take a relationship-seeker down the wrong road.

“He’s the high school stud back on the playing field. You may feel instant chemistry with this often accomplished and dynamic man. He is deeply appreciative of your wit, your professional accomplishments and your well-toned physique. But here’s the thing: He’s browsing women as if they were on a dinner menu. He has a basketful of warm bread at his fingertips. It’s far too soon for him to choose an entrée.

Yes, he may possibly even be “perfect.” But he’s not ready.

This guy simply doesn’t know what he wants yet. How could he be—just out of fifteen years with a woman who suddenly went from washing his socks to taking him to the cleaners? He needs to make a few dating mistakes: the un-relatable younger woman (Madonna who?), the entrancing goddess who has nothing to say after her verbal replay of the week’s best reality TV, the no-strings bed partner… Nice, normal You won’t look good until he’s been burned a few times and is ready for real. He’s seen the good, bad and butt-ugly end of a marriage. Expecting him to recognize quality before he’s dated a quantity of women is like peddling your heart at a flea market. “

Excerpt from Date Like A Grownup: Anecdotes, Admissions of Guilt & Advice Between Friends by Heather Dugan. Copyright 2014. All rights reserved.

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Heather Dugan is a columnist, speaker and author with a focus on human connection. Her latest book, Date Like A Grownup: Anecdotes, Admissions of Guilt & Advice Between Friends, examines the impact of loneliness and social obsolescence on men and women in their second single lives and provides strategies for better living after divorce.